Smutty Nonsense

I’m so glad you asked.

 Smutty nonsense is the book you take to bed with you when you “have a headache” and “need to rest.”

It’s the book that makes you cringe because it’s so ridiculous, but also, you need to change your underwear now. 

It’s the book that takes your mind off whatever is troubling you at the moment and transports you to a world in which sexual and romantic partners are perfect even in their imperfections. And no matter how fraught the journey might be, it always ends happily. (I hate that that rhymed)

Smutty nonsense is the book you read and wonder: Do men like this actually exist? (No), and Is it really possible to have that many orgasms back-to-back? (If you answered yes, please hop in my DMs and explain. For science).

Finally, if nothing else, it’s the book that makes you feel good while reading it, and just for that, you love it.

Smutty nonsense has gotten me through some of my darkest times, and highlighted the good times with a little something extra. More than anything, though, I love smutty nonsense because it’s ours.

 We are the authors of these stories. We decide what we want to see and what we don’t. We set the standards for our fictional love interests, and we make them follow those standards to a T.

Smutty nonsense belongs to us. And in a world where so much has been taken from us—is being taken from us currently—something that’s just ours is precious. No matter the imperfect editing or the loose threads left untied or the repetitive use of the same freakin’ synonyms for “penis” and “vagina,” over and over and over.

We created this fascinating subgenre for ourselves and no one else, and we did it without permission. And in that way alone, smutty nonsense is perhaps the most sensible part of our lives.

So, here you will find the smutty nonsense I write for us. It’s ridiculous, it’s hot, it’ll take you away from the bullshit of reality, and it certainly is not permitted.